Traumatherapie en coaching bij trauma

BODY & NERVOUS SYSTEM

If you’ve experienced trauma, you have an over-alert nervous system that kicks in at the slightest thing. This will flood you with physical sensations and emotions. During the sessions, we will spend a lot of time calming this automatic mechanism that has often developed long ago. We will also strive to release the frostbite that you have built up in your body.

Through exercises you will learn to regulate your body so that you do not feel overwhelmed or less overwhelmed. So you will no longer flee or fight it, but instead embrace and accept it. We are not going to relive the situation or circumstances that caused the trauma!

We use different techniques that have their origin in meditation, yoga, EFT/TFT (‘tapping’) and Somatic Experiencing. It depends on what works best for you and at what time. It is often a combination of these techniques.

When your body is calmer, there is also room in your head to look at your system; how have parts of yourself manifested themselves and how can we ensure that you come as close as possible to yourself and your own power.

BODY & NERVOUS SYSTEM

If you’ve experienced trauma, you have an over-alert nervous system that kicks in at the slightest thing. This will flood you with physical sensations and emotions. During the sessions, we will spend a lot of time calming this automatic mechanism that has often developed long ago. We will also strive to release the frostbite that you have built up in your body.

Through exercises you will learn to regulate your body so that you do not feel overwhelmed or less overwhelmed. So you will no longer flee or fight it, but instead embrace and accept it. We are not going to relive the situation or circumstances that caused the trauma!

We use different techniques that have their origin in meditation, yoga, EFT/TFT (‘tapping’) and Somatic Experiencing. It depends on what works best for you and at what time. It is often a combination of these techniques.

When your body is calmer, there is also room in your head to look at your system; how have parts of yourself manifested themselves and how can we ensure that you come as close as possible to yourself and your own power.

MIND: YOUR SYSTEM

What does MIND actually mean? Different explanations are given. I use the description of Dan Siegel, also to indicate the difference between MIND and cognitive thinking:

“The self-organising process, both in the body and relationally, that regulates the flow of energy and information within us and between us and the outside world”

When do you do what and why? Seems like a simple question, but really gaining insight into how your self-organising system deals with the trauma is a quest that we embark on together. Understanding how your current system has developed in order to survive is central to this. To find out and transform the system I use techniques from Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS), developed 40 years ago by Richard Schwartz (USA)

In trauma, this system is often set up to keep you safe and out of the wind. This can lead to behaviour that you may not want at all or is socially unacceptable, but you may feel like you can’t stop it. Also, there will be parts of you that are tucked away where that is exactly where your strength and authenticity lies.

That beautiful system is there for a reason, the only question is whether this organisation still helps you. The answer is usually: No. The goal is that you will feel better about yourself, that you will feel and understand who you are and that you will take control of your life, not the automatic patterns that you have developed in trauma that often make you feel identified with emotions. This is done in complete safety and with the support of the physical techniques described above.

MIND: YOUR SYSTEM

What does MIND actually mean? Different explanations are given. I use the description of Dan Siegel, also to indicate the difference between MIND and cognitive thinking:

“The self-organising process, both in the body and relationally, that regulates the flow of energy and information within us and between us and the outside world”

When do you do what and why? Seems like a simple question, but really gaining insight into how your self-organising system deals with the trauma is a quest that we embark on together. Understanding how your current system has developed in order to survive is central to this. To find out and transform the system I use techniques from Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS), developed 40 years ago by Richard Schwartz (USA)

In trauma, this system is often set up to keep you safe and out of the wind. This can lead to behaviour that you may not want at all or is socially unacceptable, but you may feel like you can’t stop it. Also, there will be parts of you that are tucked away where that is exactly where your strength and authenticity lies.

That beautiful system is there for a reason, the only question is whether this organisation still helps you. The answer is usually: No. The goal is that you will feel better about yourself, that you will feel and understand who you are and that you will take control of your life, not the automatic patterns that you have developed in trauma that often make you feel identified with emotions. This is done in complete safety and with the support of the physical techniques described above.

COGNITION: VALUES & CHOICES

You may have already gone through this phase; understanding what you think, feel and do. Since you cannot ignore a survival mechanism or change it with your cognitive brain, this is the last phase of the trajectory. Because if you feel safe in your body, have been able to transform your survival system through your MIND so that it no longer overwhelms, then it is time to see how you want to proceed.

An important part of this is that you will find out what your values ​​are now; what was important to you and what was not. You may suddenly find that you prioritize different things than before you started therapy. You have changed because you are more in touch with yourSelf and no longer react out of panic or cling to people or things outside yourself to find safety.

Based on your values, we will figure out what you actually want with your life? We are going to take a closer look at your old life and see if it still suits you, you may have gained insights earlier during the process. But then what? You will see that because you feel much better about who you are and what is important to you, plans come naturally and seem logical. In any case, we will search your cognitive brain for the layout of your life that suits you.

COGNITION: VALUES & CHOICES

You may have already gone through this phase; understanding what you think, feel and do. Since you cannot ignore a survival mechanism or change it with your cognitive brain, this is the last phase of the trajectory. Because if you feel safe in your body, have been able to transform your survival system through your MIND so that it no longer overwhelms, then it is time to see how you want to proceed.

An important part of this is that you will find out what your values ​​are now; what was important to you and what was not. You may suddenly find that you prioritize different things than before you started therapy. You have changed because you are more in touch with yourSelf and no longer react out of panic or cling to people or things outside yourself to find safety.

Based on your values, we will figure out what you actually want with your life? We are going to take a closer look at your old life and see if it still suits you, you may have gained insights earlier during the process. But then what? You will see that because you feel much better about who you are and what is important to you, plans come naturally and seem logical. In any case, we will search your cognitive brain for the layout of your life that suits you.

Explanation Therapies and Tools

Internal Family Systems (IFS)

Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) is one of the fastest-growing psychotherapeutic models in the world, providing a clear, non-pathological, and empowering understanding of human cognitive and emotional life.

IFS states that every person is born with parts in which personality aspects are stored. These parts are shaped by what they experience. For example, there may be parts that are especially vulnerable (due to trauma or other negative experiences) and parts that are more proactive or reactive. If vulnerable parts are overwhelming, other parts will “radicalize” to hide this vulnerability from the system. Think, for example, of addiction, pleasing, isolating yourself, aggression, dissociation, overanalyzing, etc. The parts often form these ‘burdens’ at a young age and have not developed over time.

At the root of these parts is Self-energy, which is your essence without behavior or emotion and is innate. You may have said or thought, “I’m out of touch with myself.” If you are reactive or overwhelmed with emotions, your Self-energy will be overshadowed and it will be very difficult to connect with it. In IFS therapy, parts are ‘healed’ by Self, giving them back their authentic, less radical and overwhelming identity. Behavior becomes less radical because it is no longer constantly triggered by vulnerable feelings. They are rescued from the prison of the past. As a therapist you support, the client is central and is leading in the process.

Richard C. Schwartz, the founder of IFS therapy, developed the IFS model more than 30 years ago. IFS is now practiced by thousands of licensed therapists and other health professionals around the world. It is a transparent yet sophisticated approach that integrates psychology and spirituality as well as intrapsychic theory and family systems theory.

IFS therapy:

  • Shows to be effective in treating trauma;
  • Is a client-driven approach to therapeutic work that fully respects the pace and goals of each client;
  • Establishes a productive, trusting, and collaborative partnership between therapist and client;
  • Helps the therapist/counselor to stay centered and candid.
  • Also works well with couples, families, groups and children;

Why IFS?

IFS therapy differs from traditional approaches to psychotherapy because it uses parts theory in a very complex way. IFS teaches you to dialogue with your internal parts or ‘personalities’, build a relationship with them and help them recover. It shows how you can reach a state of mind where you no longer identify with any part.

It allows you to quickly reach the source of your problems, the most wounded nooks and crannies of your psyche and heal these wounds and release emotional burdens that have been carried for a long time. In addition, IFS is an effective self-therapy method.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT*) or ‘Tapping’

EFT is based on acupuncture, but then you tap energy nodes instead of using needles. This balances the energy system and reduces overwhelming emotional and/or physical feelings. I regularly use this in my trauma therapy, it ensures that there is more room to focus on what happens internally and what that means (introception). That introception is the basis of IFS.

The great thing about EFT is that you can integrate it into your own day to be more regulated and you can use it if you do get overwhelmed. If you do this regularly, your nervous system will be less structurally alert and it will create new neural pathways in your brain so that emotions will be less intense and come back less often.

Research shows that demonstrable physiological changes occur during and after EFT. Stress hormones are positively influenced, connections in the brain change, the functioning of your immune system is improved.

* Not to be confused with EFT couples therapy!

You can also do a separate EFT session with me, which takes 90 minutes. You fill in an intake form in advance, which we will analyse at the start of the session. This is the basis to shape the content of the EFT session, we do the EFT session together and I teach you how to apply it at home.

Explanation Therapies and Tools

Internal Family Systems (IFS)

Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) is one of the fastest-growing psychotherapeutic models in the world, providing a clear, non-pathological, and empowering understanding of human cognitive and emotional life.

IFS states that every person is born with parts in which personality aspects are stored. These parts are shaped by what they experience. For example, there may be parts that are especially vulnerable (due to trauma or other negative experiences) and parts that are more proactive or reactive. If vulnerable parts are overwhelming, other parts will “radicalize” to hide this vulnerability from the system. Think, for example, of addiction, pleasing, isolating yourself, aggression, dissociation, overanalyzing, etc. The parts often form these ‘burdens’ at a young age and have not developed over time.

At the root of these parts is Self-energy, which is your essence without behavior or emotion and is innate. You may have said or thought, “I’m out of touch with myself.” If you are reactive or overwhelmed with emotions, your Self-energy will be overshadowed and it will be very difficult to connect with it. In IFS therapy, parts are ‘healed’ by Self, giving them back their authentic, less radical and overwhelming identity. Behavior becomes less radical because it is no longer constantly triggered by vulnerable feelings. They are rescued from the prison of the past. As a therapist you support, the client is central and is leading in the process.

Richard C. Schwartz, the founder of IFS therapy, developed the IFS model more than 30 years ago. IFS is now practiced by thousands of licensed therapists and other health professionals around the world. It is a transparent yet sophisticated approach that integrates psychology and spirituality as well as intrapsychic theory and family systems theory.

IFS therapy:

  • Shows to be effective in treating trauma;
  • Is a client-driven approach to therapeutic work that fully respects the pace and goals of each client;
  • Establishes a productive, trusting, and collaborative partnership between therapist and client;
  • Helps the therapist/counselor to stay centered and candid.
  • Also works well with couples, families, groups and children;

Why IFS?

IFS therapy differs from traditional approaches to psychotherapy because it uses parts theory in a very complex way. IFS teaches you to dialogue with your internal parts or ‘personalities’, build a relationship with them and help them recover. It shows how you can reach a state of mind where you no longer identify with any part.

It allows you to quickly reach the source of your problems, the most wounded nooks and crannies of your psyche and heal these wounds and release emotional burdens that have been carried for a long time. In addition, IFS is an effective self-therapy method.

Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT*) or ‘Tapping’

EFT is based on acupuncture, but then you tap energy nodes instead of using needles. This balances the energy system and reduces overwhelming emotional and/or physical feelings. I regularly use this in my trauma therapy, it ensures that there is more room to focus on what happens internally and what that means (introception). That introception is the basis of IFS.

The great thing about EFT is that you can integrate it into your own day to be more regulated and you can use it if you do get overwhelmed. If you do this regularly, your nervous system will be less structurally alert and it will create new neural pathways in your brain so that emotions will be less intense and come back less often.

Research shows that demonstrable physiological changes occur during and after EFT. Stress hormones are positively influenced, connections in the brain change, the functioning of your immune system is improved.

* Not to be confused with EFT couples therapy!

You can also do a separate EFT session with me, which takes 90 minutes. You fill in an intake form in advance, which we will analyse at the start of the session. This is the basis to shape the content of the EFT session, we do the EFT session together and I teach you how to apply it at home.

Today I can say that I have rediscovered my confidence and self-esteem, my work-life balance, as well as my cognitive-emotional balance, with the intention of continuing to work on it. I could not have achieved this without Nikki’s professional and warm approach.

She’s is not like other therapists; not focused on investigating and explaining things from the past with the intention of determining my behavior today by working on it cognitively. But in trauma healing (although this is a big word, it is also about minor injuries that led to certain behaviors today). Healing the trauma puts the focus back on the “self” in me that is in control of what happens, that takes control of how I behave.

Nikki is very professional in her approach. She believes in what she does, even if it is a bit against the grain of our society. She is very good at what she does: through IFS she tackles the real issues, without you getting the feeling that she is doing that. There is a clear trajectory. Moreover, as a person she is also a very warm personality who really gives herself completely and is willing to go the extra mile to see her client grow. She is also honest and will tell you if she feels it doesn’t seem to be working.

J from W (BE), man (50)

At the end of the session I quickly say “Thank you very much” to you.. and that sounds so wafer thin because I also feel so grateful.. Only now do I feel that I really start, and the therapy you give me and how you do that… is so close to me. This suits me… I try to put it into words but it is more than that… a feeling! I am so grateful that you are on my path as my therapist and I learn so much but also that you make it work with your info and exercises, that I feel more clarification and only now get to know myself without all those parts. I really think it’s so special and beautiful that you know how to make me move… learning to detach from all that.

N from H (NL)
ABOUT TRAUMA
OPTIONS THERAPY
ABOUT NIKKI
MORE ABOUT TRAUMA
OPTIONS THERAPY
ABOUT NIKKI

CONTACT

PHONE & WHATSAPP

  • NL: +31 (0)6 19333196
  • BE: +32 (0)4 65008351

Scan the QR code with your mobile
to open whatsapp